(B) WHAT IS YOUR DEEPEST CRAVING?

What is your deepest craving?

What is the deepest craving in human nature? The deepest craving in human nature is the craving to be__________________. Can all of you in the audience take a minute to fill in the blank?

You see it becomes fun when people begin guessing all sorts of cravings------to be rich, millionaire, great shape, beautiful, happy, loved, immortal, disease free, etc"

Willliam James, the great psychologist and philosopher, discovered after a lifetime research into human nature that it was the craving to be APPRECIATED. He was surprised that it ran deeper than the craving for love.

When women were asked,"Why did you divorce your husband?" Was it he didn't love you?" "Not really. He loved me in his own sick way; it was just I didn't feel appreciated."
Even abused children felt a certain sense of love, they almost never felt appreciated.

When you express appreciation in word , deed or even a card or mail, it sends a electrifying experience, one which the receiver will never forget. "I love you". message is a bit uncertain, the context has to be appropriate for it to connect. Yes, everyone craves appreciation, as everyone feels under-appreciated, Have you ever heard anyone express, " My problem is receiving so many people appreciating me. I am stressed out."

When Xerox was giant in sales, the Koether brothers wanted to challenged it by hiring good sales people with a passion for customer appreciation; it was mission impossible. After a few years, they were ahead of Xeror in sales.How? The Brothers had all the accounts people call on their customers to thank them on Thanksgiving Day, what they were grateful for, all the things they appreciated for their support; the response was so overwhelming that they looked forward to another Thanksgiving Day.

Do you believe it works? Then try expressing appreciation to someone in your life whom you have never appreciated before. The results can be so dramatic that it changes relationships forever.
Bear in mind all human beings have this craving to be appreciated--deeper than any craving in human nature. You will connect at a deeper level than you have ever thought.

It is a good motto to live by for creating relationships, since most people do not think and thank; the experience can be unforgettable.

Think about how specific the appreciation is about, the more specific, the more real it will feel to someone. "I really appreciate you, Jaszlyn, when you make the bed for your brother." Jaszlyn will feel appreciated she deserves; to improve the self-esteem of children, catch them in the act of doing something right. Child psychology is true for all psychology. The more we practise appreciation of others,our relationships will improve greatly.

Lack of thinking and thanking people erode gradually the sure ground of long-term relationships. For not thinking, we subconsciously wait for people to become worthy of our appreciation. We wait for them to change first, like most people waiting for other people to go first. This is a feeling-approach, to go first, as justified to me; it is not good thinking. It doesn't get me what I want; maybe, it gets me more of what I don't want, preventing me from thanking you for what I do apprecaiate.

Good thinking will lead to thanking, and makes good relationship grow.
Most people have a hard time giving because they never tried unconditional giving.--they did give in the form of trading, worrying what they could get back. Happiness is already present during the giving. It is created by the giving.
Creating the relation shift from being a taker to being a giver uplifts the giver to committing more as a contributor of relationship and happiness for both parties.